Move Over Snuggies, Hello Loud N' Clear!
Last month Freedom Haters was obsessed with the whole Snuggie (the blanket that has sleeves) infomercial craze. But that's soooooo January 2009. Now we are obsessed with Loud N' Clear.
"It turns ordinary hearing into extraordinary hearing!"
Basically, it a bluetooth looking device that gives you bionic hearing. WELL FUCK ME SIDEWAYS! It's great, it allows you to eavesdrop on people at parties. In the infomercial, with his Loud N' Clear device, a man tunes into a group of women whispering from across the room:
"Isn't he's cute. He just moved into the building."
Why most overheard-via-a-device conversations always be positive. Couldn't the opposite happen as well? Couldn't he also tune into women saying:
"Isn't he's really creepy. He just moved into the building and wears an eavesdropping device!"
Or, the woman across the street, instead of hearing "A new car! They must be doing really good," she instead hears, "Another case of vodka! They must have a drinking problem.
Yes, bionic hearing; it's your blessing, it's your curse.
Already, tributes to Loud N' Clear have it the InterWeb. Freedom Haters was amused with this take:
Loud N' Clear
If you had a Loud N' Clear device 30 years ago, they would think you were from the future.
Future
Imagine seeing someone wearing a snuggie with a Loud N' Clear! We are in the future.......
Back to the Future
Imagine remaking the movie Back to the Future with Marty McFly clad in a Snuggie and Loud N' Clear venturing to the 1950's.
confused
Wasn't that an 80s movie? He would be from the 80s going from the future to the 1950s?
Remake
No, I'm talking remake along the lines of the Johnny Knoxville vehicle, Dukes of Hazzard. I'm talking all the Jonas Brothers in the Marty McFly role. I'm talking Brad Pitt in the Crispen Glover role. I'm talking big box office opening weekend!
Woah
Johnny knoxville and the jonas brothers in the same movie?
Knoxville
Don't mock the acting of Knoxville. I just saw his tour-de-force performance in The Ringer.
My favorite lines
1. Bingo!
2. Hey, wait for me (in munchkin voice)
3. They just got a new car, they must be doing really well.
4. BINGO!
Magical
I know, the Loud N' Clear is a magical device that only allows people to overhear good things said about them. It's competitor's device, Loud N' Nasty, does the complete opposite.
johnny, and other stuff
I don't know what that would say about him or the jonas brothers?!
As for the Loud N' Nasty......I don't know if anyone would buy something called such! "Hey guys, check out my new Loud N' Nasty, it just came in the mail!"
Post new comment