When it comes to T-shirts sold in Vegas, gone are the days of clever double-entendres. For example, look at the T-shirt above. If a guy wore this, it would be the most effective form of birth control being no women in her right mind would ever want to sleep with him.

And in case you didn’t get the joke about being an Amateur Gynecologist, the T-shirt designers added the two fingers to graphically drive the point home.

Please, more subtlety in your message. This T-shirt designer is a regular Oscar Wilde of wit. Again, all the humor would be lost if they didn’t include the white sploshes. A crisp $20 bill to anyone who wears this the first time they meet their new girlfriend’s parents.

Do you have a favorite T-shirt that you would never see a live human wear?

Check out my complete Vegas T-shirt shopping spree at Craveonline.

The former National Aerobics Champ takes us on a little video journey. We begin in church. A gospel choir is adorned in what appears to be Snuggies. Aerobic dancers in short-shorts are silhouetted in dark shadows. Then it breaks into a big Kumbaya/gospel extravaganza.

Coming off the heels of Paul Eugene’s Sanctified Slide, this is another one of Christian aerobic’s finest hours. Where Eugene’s style was more in-your-face, Michelle LaMay’s production builds to a full-blown Broadway extravaganza that totes not only Christians and church, but also gospel robes, obscenely tight aerobics clothes, and gospel choirs. Makes me want to get down and pray while working on my calves and thighs.

Read the full scoop at Huffington Post.

On Saturday, six men armed with assault rifles and machetes stormed the European Poker Tour (EPT) in Berlin and made off with the $1.2 million tournament prize money. Who orchestrated this: the screenwriters of the Bourne Supremacy?

As a frequent correspondent of the poker tour, I can’t believe this heist took place in broad daylight in the heart of Berlin. Is German casino security on par with that of a KFC rent-a-cop? The robbers got away unscathed and no serious injuries were reported. Tournament play resumed mere hours after the attack. Yes, armed robberies come-and-go but poker must live on! All I can say is, why don’t I get the exciting tournaments to report on?

You Tube let us experience the mayhem mere minutes after the incident:

Who would have figured that gay male prostitutes would being procured for members inside Pope Benedict’s inner circles? Shocker that Catholic priests are involved in yet another sex scandal–this time at the highest level.  Italian newspapers published transcripts of phone calls recorded by police involving  Angelo Balducci, a Gentleman of His Holiness,  who was caught-on-tape negotiating with Thomas Chinedu Ehiem, a 29-year-old Nigerian Vatican chorister, about men he wanted brought to him for the sexual purposes of getting down papal-style.

Here’s the going rate for male prostitutes (two black Cuban lads,” a former male model from Naples, and a rugby player from Rome) at the Vatican:

2,000 euros ($2,714) per rent boy.

That’s enough to make any holy man get down and pray! I’ll lose all faith in humanity if its disclosed that the Popemobile was involved in transporting the male prostitutes to the Vatican.

Ironically, the police were tapping the Vatican’s phones as part of surveillance that was being  conducted for an unrelated corruption investigation.

Yesterday, it was reported that O.J. Simpson’s suit from his infamous murder trial was rejected from being shown at the Smithsonian Institution. Today, the LAPD announced that the regret putting on display the clothing worn by Sen. Robert F. Kennedy when he was assassinated in 1968.  Hmmm? How did they think that would slip under the radar of NOT offending members of the Kennedy family.

As a part of the California Homicide Investigators Association Conference in Las Vegas, the exhibition, “Behind-The-Scenes: The LAPD Homicide Experience,” showcased evidence from notorious cases during the past 100 years, including actress Marilyn Monroe’s death, the Manson family murders and the O.J. Simpson homicides. (What’s up with all this O.J. clothing in the news?) This morbid display also featured Robert Kennedy’s  dress shirt, tie and jacket worn on the day of his assignation–until members of the Kennedy clan complained that they were highly offended.

If you’re planning to attend the event, don’t be dismayed: you’ll still be able to see artifacts from the Bank of America shootout and Onion Field killing. Now it’s on to Chicago and let’s win there.

Besides throwing her a series of softball questions, Jay also let the former governor of Alaska performstand up comedy on the show; a new low for both the world of comedy and the Tonight Show.

Obviously written by a team of Tonight Show writers, what Sarah Palin’s stand upcomedy act could have benefited from was a crazy catchphrase.

Palin needed an astute line that would help pull in her target audience–something that would reach the lowest common denominator that comprises her fan base and speaks to the real America.

Is Sarah Palin destined to be the next Larry the Cable Guy? In my idyllic world, here’s how I’d love to see Sarah Palin’s new career as a stand up comedian: